Summary: A look at what Avengers: Infinity War was like from the Perspective of Loki Silvertongue
This is it, the last chapter… and the saddest chapter 😭
If you made it this far it’s because you like pain and idk what it says about you but I do know what it says about me that I wrote this. 😅
Anyway please… enjoy? Feels weird to say that. Just CW that this is canon compliant, so if you’ve seen Infinity War I think you know how it’s gonna turn out for my main man. 😭😭😭
Avengers: Infinity War (Loki’s Version)
As the ship sailed through space and away from the burning Asgard the weight of what they had done pressed itself on Loki. He stood by Thor, the new king, and bitterness rose up in his throat.
He remembered Thor’s words when he had returned to find Loki in the guise of Odin, his claims that the Nine Realms were in ruin and the Loki simply ate grapes and watched theatre.
Of course Thor had to appear during a moment of leisure. Loki had been working hard to restore peace in the realms. It was true that things were in disarray, which was why he spent most of his time in council meetings and working with the leaders of other realms to restore peace. He was negotiating and politicking, doing his best to avoid war rather than picking a fight with every being he came across.
He had commissioned the plays Thor was so dismissive of in order to boost the morale of the populace, who were well aware of the turmoil and looking for escapism. Loki knew he had been a good king. And he knew others knew it because when Thor had revealed that Loki was masquerading as Odin no one in the crowd had been surprised. He could see in the way that some of the remaining Asgardians were eying Thor and Loki in turn that some would still rather Loki were king. But what was Loki to do? Thor was the elder son, the rightful heir.
Once he and Thor were alone, and Thor explained his plan to head to earth, Loki was even more doubtful. It was not as though Loki were exactly well-liked there.
Still, he had pushed through, up until he saw a ship that filled him with dread. Thanos was there… and Loki had the tesseract.
They were lucky that the ship had a secondary vessel with cloaking features. As a stealth vessel, it couldn’t move quickly, but with the distraction of Loki, Thor, the Hulk, and Heimdall staying on the main ship they were hopeful that Thanos would not be looking for it. Valkyrie went on the stealth ship along with half of their warriors, the children, and those unable to fight. The rest stayed to greet Thanos and the Black Order.
Loki knew that they stood little to no chance, but still held a sliver of hope that they would be able to combat the titan. This hope turned desperate when he realized that not all of the families had made it on to the smaller craft. A desperate PA was sent out, hoping against hope that someone would hear them, someone would help them… though at the same time that felt like dooming their would-be saviors, for they had not accounted for Thanos already holding the power stone.
Loki supposed that it was a privilege that so many had died so quickly. They would not suffer from slow deaths. Still, he mourned for those who were lost. He knew that many thought him heartless, and truthfully he had not done much to dissuade them from believing it was so. Yet he had a love for his people, and with them being so few now, he felt an ache at their loss. He only hoped that the other craft would make it safely to Earth. Valkyrie was a drunk, but like recognized like, and Loki could tell the difference between a lack of morals and lashing out due to pain. She had lost too much to not protect what was left of the people of Asgard.
Loki was an expert at playing both sides of a conflict to his own advantage, of making sure that whatever group came out on top, he was always with the victors. And yet when he was pulled to stand with the Black Order, facing against his brother in all but blood and what was left of the Asgardians, he felt bile rise in his mouth. He wanted to be on the winning side, but not like this. Not if it meant losing the last of the people who mattered to him. That shallow victory was not a victory at all. As Ebony Maw waxed poetic about “the Great Titan” about “balance” about the value of their “sacrifice” and how their suffering was salvation Loki grew steadily more furious. The so-called children of Thanos were nothing but puppets, beaten and broken to do his bidding. Many of them had watched as he suffered at the hands of the other, their gazes saying “this happened to me too. I cannot and will not save you.” There was no pity or remorse or kindness from any of them. Of all the children of Thanos he knew of only two who had rebelled against him and still lived. Gamora and Nebula. Nebula was a rogue who had aligned herself with the Kree zealot Ronan. Gamora was a member of those so-called Guardians of the Galaxy. They were the ones who had entrusted the power stone to the Nova Core. If Thanos had the power stone, then who knew what state Xandar was in.
While Thor may have contented himself with merely staying in the Nine Realms and keeping an eye on things there, Loki had made a point to venture beyond and keep abreast of things in the wider galaxy. After his brush with the Mad Titan he could not afford to be uniformed. Gamora and Nebula were of particular interest to him as he often remembered the particular exchanges they had with one another. They seemed almost like family in a way that others of Thanos’ children did not. He could not help but remember the way that Gamora had challenged him with her glare. Her eyes were cold, calculating, familiar. They said “I have not been broken.” Thanos had never owned her the way he did his other “children.” He felt a kinship with her. Perhaps, in another world, they could have been allies, or dare he contemplate it, friends. Each of them had been taken from their families, molded into the image of their adoptive fathers. Each of them had a sibling not of their blood but of their heart.
Yet for all that Loki at times hated Odin, for all that Odin had contributed to Loki’s hatred of his own species, for all that Odin had done against him, some part of him still cared for his father, still claimed him as such, while he knew that Gamora wanted nothing more than to plunge a dagger into Thano’s heart.
And with Odin and Frigga gone, with Asgard destroyed, and his sons, while safe in Vanaheim, knowing nothing of him, and Sigyn safe but hating him entirely… Thor was all Loki had left. So was it any wonder that Loki gave up the tesseract? Was it any wonder that he feigned allegiance to Thanos only to make his best attempt to kill the Titan? In retrospect, there were perhaps better ways he could have attempted to go about it, but Loki’s mind was undoubtedly clouded by his rage, by his fear.
After so many instances of feigning his death, of bringing himself back from the brink, Loki was filled with dread as he realized that his true expiration was approaching. Thanos’ grim statement of no resurrections was entirely accurate.
Yet he could not help but attempt to assure Thor that the sun would shine on them again.
Perhaps it was a fanciful wish.
Perhaps it was deceitful of him to offer such a false assurance.
Perhaps it was a fitting end for the Liesmith, to end his life with a beautiful, preposterous, and broken promise.
If this made you sad READ Snap Back to the Past AKA the Infinity Stones Decide to Adopt Tony Stark! It’s a frostironstrange time travel fix it where Loki gets to live his best life. It’s got some angst but not nearly as much as this fic. It is also much less painful for me as a writer to write. This fic definitely needed to be written though, it was very cathartic. Again, I do know what this says about me, let’s not say the quiet part out loud thanks…